The Great Commission Begins at Home

    Then Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to Me.  Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.  And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."  

--Matthew 28:18-20

I believe that it is every Christian's duty to fulfill the Great Commission personally.  

I think that all of us feel the weight of "making disciples" of all nations.  Have you ever felt the need to witness to a co-worker or to invite your child's teacher to church or to hand out a tract or a Bible to a waitress or children knocking on your door for Halloween?  

Maybe you are like me when those promptings happen.  You get nervous.  You hope that you have the right words to say when the moment comes.  You pray that the words that you write on the note or receipt or card are received well.  

When we are at church, the language of salvation and discipleship is usually focused on the world that needs to know Jesus.  This in turn gets our minds thinking about those outside the body of Christ who haven't heard of Jesus.  We make plans to reach out, and if accepted, hopefully walk them down a path toward discipleship.  We are willing to walk them through Bible studies, lead them to a small group, attend with them at church, accompany them to conferences and retreats, all for the hope of making disciples for Jesus.  If God allows, He gives us the honor to baptize them in the Lord, as well.

Unintentionally, this type of messaging causes most of the effort of discipleship within the church to be  focused on the outside world instead of the children of faithful believers in the church.  We have settled for a discipleship that merely takes children to the next Sunday School class or youth group event and call that discipleship.  But consider the difference of personal involvement most of us would do for the unsaved friend (listed above) to the meager efforts we give our children and youth, in comparison.

Statistics have consistently shown that 70-88% of youth walk away from the faith they professed by their second year in college.  That is an alarming statistic!  

I have often thought that the shrinking church in the United States is an indictment against both the church and families within it concerning their discipleship efforts.  If a faithful family has 3 children (as mine does), then a family who pours their efforts of discipleship primarily (but not solely) into their children should see 3 faithful believers to replace 2 (Dad & Mom) from the generation before them.  That should be a net gain of 1, not a net loss of 2.

Now I realize that our discipleship efforts will not create a 100% conversion rate, even for the most faithful families.  However, I believe it also shouldn't produce a 70-88% dropout rate either.  If 70-88% of our children remained faithful disciples of Christ into their adult years, we should produce a net gain in the faithful, or at the very minimum, prevent shrinkage.  

All of this leads me to some unexpected questions:  

What if the family was the place where God wanted us to "cut our discipling teeth"?  What if having children and raising them in the Lord was the primary training ground for discipleship for all of us?

Consider the following reasons that family discipleship prepares us for discipleship outside the home.

1.  Learning how to love unconditionally

As much as I love my wife, I had to learn to love her.  With my children, however, my love was there from the start.  It doesn't mean that I also didn't have to learn to love them, as well.  But with my children the love they began with sheltered them from the idea that I would ever take that love away, no matter how I felt.  If I was angry, I still loved them.  If I was disappointed in them, I still loved them.  If I needed to punish them, I still loved them.  If I argued with them, I still loved them.  

This helped me understand God's unconditional love for us and how I should extend that love to others.

2.  Willingness to learn something new

One of my daughters loves to draw, paint and knit.  My other daughter loves to exercise, read, cook and socialize with her friends.  My son has a passion for playing the piano.  Knitting, cooking and playing piano are not areas of my expertise.  However, because my children have a passion for these things, I have tried to learn about each of these areas as I have tried to guide their growing interest.

When it comes to a desire to see their faith grow in Christ, I too, must be willing to grow beyond my knowledge of the Word of God, in order to further guide them in their faith.  Therefore, over the years, I have read the Bible many times, read numerous books to help me in my faith, gone to camps and conferences, all to train myself in a way that I might also be able to train them.

I need this growth whether I am teaching my children or discipling anyone else.

3.  Challenged in a safe environment

All of us fear getting a question we don't know the answer to from a non-believer whom we are trying to reach for Jesus.  Often times, those questions are seen through the lens of a "gotcha" moment, even if they weren't meant that way.  We perceive that the question that they ask and our lack of an answer to those questions represent a failure by ourselves and represent a "gotcha" moment that they won the argument and no longer have to consider the claims of Christ.

However, when children ask those same penetrating questions about faith (i.e. "Where did God come from?" or "How come God allows bad things to happen?"), while the challenge to answer the question remains, the fear that their eternity hangs in the balance doesn't.  Even if we do not know the answer, it gives us the incentive to search for the answer.  Many of these types of questions will happen long before the teenage years, if you are having consistent conversations about faith with your children.

Being challenged in a loving environment with our children helps us not overreact when we receive the same questions concerning faith that our unbelieving family, friends & co-workers may ask of us.   

4.  The joy of celebrating successes

Whether congratulating them for reading through the New Testament, praising them for reaching out to their friends for Jesus, encouraging them as they remember to pray for their friends & family and noticing their generosity as it pertains to giving to the things of God, your encouragement to your children is necessary for their continued growth in Christ.

In the same way, learning to celebrate even small successes with those whom you are reaching for Christ encourages them further in their growth in Christ.  

Successes in discipleship come for both the person discipling and the person being discipled.  I will never forget the joy of baptizing all three of my children in the Lord.   There is something amazing about fulfilling part of the Great Commission in your own family.

5.  No illusions about the time factor

The biggest lesson we never take for granted with our children is that it takes a long time to prepare them for the real world.  It doesn't matter if it is spelling, reading, math or history & science.  Helping our children be prepared for the world is going to take the better part of 20 years.  When it comes to a mature faith in Christ for our children, it is going to take an equal amount of time and commitment for our part as parents.  It truly is an investment of time and energy for which there is no short cut.  

However, the same holds true for those whom we wish to bring into a maturing faith.  Jesus spent 3 1/2 years with His disciples to prepare them for the time when they would be without Him (physically).  It isn't a matter of simply walking someone through "the sinner's prayer" and baptizing them.  It is patiently preparing them to also become a mature disciple who can then disciple others.  Discipling our children helps us understand the commitment it is going to take to make this happen.

6.  Confidence of knowing how to make disciples

Discipling my own children has given me the confidence on how to disciple others.  Because of my experience with my kids, I now know how and where to start with someone else.  I also am more prepared on how to guide them through the entire process.  And because of my children, I understand the commitment Jesus is calling me to in making disciples of others.

What if that was His plan for blessing us with children all along?